Walls Longing to Fall

We build up walls no one can break
We build up walls of fear and self hate
Crashing, banging
Battering these walls
The world does all it can
But no one
Nothing
You tell yourself
Will ever get in again
You build your walls much stronger
Harder, higher
Till no one else can see
What lies within
Your thoughts
Your fears
Your truest self
Is almost completely hidden
Till one day a new approach
Someone takes the time
To not batter, bash, and chip away
But instead embrace
And cherish
Your walls begin to crumble
and start to fade away
Your true self revealed
Your inner thoughts displayed
And what they find is not ugly
harsh, hatred, or hurt
Instead they find the very thing
That got them through to you
The thing you wanted
Needed
Craved the very most
The very tool they used
The truest and most pure
What got them through to you
and what they found there
are one in the same
and now more powerful than ever
Because it is shared
Because it is now theirs
as well as yours
But of course
What did they find
What did you need
What else but
Love

Fireflies Dance

Feeling kind of stressed
Felling lost
Take a step outside and breathe
Close your eyes and you'll be fine
Just listen

For the moon shines bright
The stars come out
The birds sing in the trees
And the fireflies dance

If you lost a love
lost a job
lost a faithful friend
If you're not sure
how to go on
And you're praying for an end

Just close your eyes and you'll be fine
Take a step outside and breathe
And listen

For the moon shines bright
The stars come out
The birds sing in the trees
And the fireflies dance

Know that this is not the end
Life will still go on
It gets better

The moon'll shine bright
The stars'll come out
The birds will sing in the trees
And the fireflies dance

Time

Time is the most terrifying thing in the universe
It is unrelenting
Never changing
It cannot be fought or won
It cannot be bargened with
You cannot change time
Trade time
Alter time
Get more time
It has no master
It can only be accepted
Every point in your life can never be had again
Every point you reach is an end
The end of your childhood
Your teens
Your 20's
So many endings
You cannot go back and relive your 20's once you reach 30
You are stuck where you are
There is no negotiation
It is terrifying to think
I will never be younger
I will never do all those things I wished I had done
I may get the chance eventually
But it will always be different
I will always be older
I cannot go back
I cannot try again
I must accept each day as it comes
And hope for more

I Thought It's What I Wanted

I thought it's what I wanted

I thought it would be fine

I gave myself away

and put my heart on the line

But it's not right

It's not real

You don't care

How I feel

And I thought it's what I wanted

I thought it would be fine

I gave myself away

and put my heart on the line

But I was wrong

Woah oooh oh

I was wrong

They never stay

They never care

They only want me

if it's fun

I need a love

beyond compare

I'm waiting

wanting

failing

falling

fading

Giving too much

Giving no more!

Cause I thought it's what I wanted

I thought it would be fine

I gave myself away

and put my heart on the line

But I was wrong

Uncertainty

I try
I try to pretend like everything's fine
Pretend that I don't cry
Everyday feeling like a failure in life
Everyday so uncertain

But I feel like I'm falling
I feel like I can't breathe
I feel like I'm drowning
in a sea of uncertainty

I try
Try to convince myself to go on
Get up and face the day
Put on a smile and face the world
Keep in what I want to say

That I feel like I'm falling
I feel like I can't breathe
I feel like I'm drowning
in a sea of uncertainty

Because I don't know what to do with my life
I don't know who I am
I feel so alone and I
don't think you'll understand
I feel worthless, selfish, stupid, helpless and alone
Fell like I need to run away and leave everything I know

Can someone help me
I feel like I'm falling
I feel like I can't breathe
I feel like I'm drowning
in a sea of uncertainty

Multicultural Attraction

Light and dark
Black and white
Let's combine
Two parallels intertwined
We are polarizing, beautiful
A mysterious enigma
Every multifarious, multifaceted mashup
Enticingly delicious
Beautiful in it's complexity
Embrace diversity
Embrace each other

Just Words

Just words
We spoke of many things
He and I
But what did it bring
A bit of fun
A moment of passion
Or two
Or ten
But what did it bring
Just words in the end

Wanderlust - A Dreary Morning

A grey dark dreary morning
The start of another week
I hear the familiar sound of rain
Smell the faint petrichor
My mind and body longing for more sleep
Light filters in through my windows
I watch the dust dance in it's rays
I hope and wish for many things
Love, adventure, the future I dream of

My heart aches

Yearning for change

Wanderlust fills my soul

Alas, I must move on
Time will slip away
if I do not embrace it.
My dreams will have to wait.

Lost

A tangled mass of vines and weeds
Roses and thorns
Truths and lies
My life, my thoughts, my heart, my needs
A labyrinth with no map, no key
A puzzle to hard to solve?
Perhaps.
How can I know?
Who can I tell?
Who could ever really know me?
If I don't even know myself?

What Are You Doing With Your Life?

Pick a direction
Choose a path
What are you going to do?
Make a decision
Start your life
What are you going to do?
It's time to decide what you want to do
For the rest of your life. Your career.
Figure it out
Don't make a mistake
Or you could be stuck
Forever.

Good luck!

My Longtime Friend

So many years between us
but what now?
We're both so different
from who we used to be.
Those summers spent together
in the woods, so long ago...
Enchanting. Intriguing.
Nostalgic. Long gone.
We can't go back.
We're just too different.
And yet last night,
you said you love me.

Woman Wasting Away

A life too full to live
No time for
Relaxation
Reflection
Recovery
Romance
To much to do
To much to give
Waning
Wanting
Wasting away
Wishing for just one free day

Solivagant

My muscles work to move me forward
But my heart isn't in it anymore
Another day I get to live
But my heart isn't in it
Another meal
Another job
Another man
Another responsibility
Life continues
Earth moves on
But my heart isn't

Don't break

Legs moving forward
Heart heavy
Just keep moving
Don't think
If you think,
you will break
If you break,
you will fall
Heart heavy
Too heavy
Don't break

Daydream

Cloudless clear blue skies
River flowing by
Daydream of many things
Wonder what life will bring

Dreaming of us
Dreaming of you
Drifting along this sea of blue
Flying high
Falling low
Where should we go
Where can we go

Soft breeze not a care
Sweet flowers fill the air
Daydream of many things
Wonder what life will bring

Let's Find Time

Time and place
Enchant
Embrace
If we had the time
I have the place
Re-meet
Romance
Post encounter of chance
Unexpected
Desired
Sparks ignite a new fire

Ferocious Melancholy

The wind surrounds and pulls and bites
Enchanting in it's ferocity
Then comes the cold dark sleepless nights
Devoid of all velocity
Hell's frozen fury fills the air
It whips and stings
With all it's might
Melancholy and despair
Fills these cold dark sleepless nights
Time moves slower
So it seems
I lie awake
Praying for sweet dreams

Kept Apart

How can you be so close
Yet feel so far away
It's like I'm chasing a ghost
When no words come my way
I know we had something
I know it was real
Do you understand the way that I feel
We once were so close
till you drifted away
I miss you the most
but what can I say
I know our time was short
I know we must be apart
But darling I hope you know
You'll always have a piece of my heart

Valentine

Would you be my valentine
What if you knew the real me
I wish that I could call you mine
And tell you all my secrets
We could be together
For just a little while
Or maybe forever
I know you make me smile
I want to let you in
I wish that you could see
Exactly who I am
And who I want to be
Would you be my valentine
What if you knew the real me

Flying Falling

I hear a songbird out my window and want to fly.
Please let me join you and be free!
I close my eyes and all at once I'm flying high.
Imagine soaring far above the trees!
I fly for hours exploring everywhere,
to all the places I've always longed to see.
Such freedom!
Ecstasy beyond compare!
Until suddenly I realize it's just me.
I am all alone and I start falling,
faster than I ever knew I could.
I thought this was my dream,
this was my calling.
This change was supposed to be good!

Sad Sudden Silence

Have you thought of me lately
As I have often thought of you
This silence between us
Screams loudly at the back of my mind
Is this goodbye

An Overflowing Heart

My soul overflows from my eyes
I try to stop the rain
It's all too much
The tears fall down
I try to hide the pain
Gotta keep it together
Trying to be strong
It's driving me insane
Trying to pretend that everything's fine
Is like trying to stop the rain

Don't Pretend

You never loved me
you loved the idea of me.
You could never quite accept me
completely for who I was.
Who I am.
Especially now.
You say I've changed.
Yes. People change.
I've changed for the better.
I know who I am.
I know what I want.
I know I don't want you.
I want to be happy.
I want to be free.
I will be who I am without apology.

Bliss

Let's drink each other in
as our hearts and bodies intertwine.
Time slips away.
Passion ignites.
As the air around us tingles with electricity.
I can never get enough!
We shall get drunk on each other
completely entranced.
Then stumble away
lighthearted and blissful
into the night.

Hold On

I know things won't always
be this way.
I know life won't always
be so hard.
I have a better future ahead,
if I can only get there.
Just breathe.
Just hold on.
Just make it through the day,
the week, the month.
Hope is difficult to grasp.
I cling to the tiniest sliver of it
and hold on for dear life.